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Published on mars 27th, 2016 | by Archer


The Classic Mistake of Giving Your All (To Someone Who Won’t)

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Okay, let’s talk about regrets and compromise. Pretty heavy huh?

Oftentimes, people like us fall into the pit of investing your everything to someone who does not and won’t recognize your value. These people would treat you like you’re trash. They won’t value your importance. Even though this is already a big slash to your ego, chances are, you will keep on going.

It’s a classic mistake, giving your all to someone who just doesn’t care.  If you’re giving too much and investing time to something that is not working, might as well take a look at your battered self-esteem first. Offer yourself the freedom that you truly need. Uplift your dignity and take a walk – and keep walking.

Much has been said about unhealthy relationships or hopeless one-sided affairs. Attempting to make the feelings mutual even though it’s not often lead to hurting, distrusting, shaming and even blaming oneself because they are often in the quest of trying to get what they want through giving. This impales one’s identity by desperately trying to fit into the mold of the other person.

There’s one quote from where really hits me down the core. (It’s not mine though, got it somewhere and took note of it)

« When you give and give and give and give and possibly give some more, it’s because you’re an over-giver who doesn’t truly believe that you without the excessive giving is enough. You overdo it because you’re attempting to create a tipping point where the other person will reciprocate and match you and you’ll basically get a return on your investment. When you don’t, you feel devalued by the experience.”

In addition, the quote says..

Over-giving is a distinct sign of trying to use external solutions (people) to fix your internal problems while using ‘giving’ as your bartering mechanism. When you address and begin to mend your relationship with you, you can put more energy into giving to you instead of draining and neglecting you to boost others.

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About the Author

is one of our resident writers. With a melismatic style of writing, his knack of superfluous verbosity is strikingly evident. When he's not hooked up with his Mimi tunes, Archer can be found dealing with programming codes as he is also working as a Software Engineer at one of the IT companies in the metro. For those who know him well, it is a common fact that he's also fond of reading and writing online dating articles. Being a hopeless romantic at heart, Archer is indeed - a fine addition to our pool of writers.   You can reach him on the following social media accounts: Tumblr // Twitter // Instagram // Facebook // Odesk

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